Brunswick Beacon, 07.04.24
Speaking in land-locked Nevada, Donald Trump asked, ‘Would you rather be electrocuted or eaten by a shark?’
Trump hates sharks. Porn star Stormy Daniels, whose sexcapades with Trump brought him 34 felony convictions, said Trump “made me watch an entire documentary about shark attacks. He is obsessed with sharks…He was like, ‘I donate to all these charities and I would never donate to any charity that helps sharks.’”
Trump unintentionally confirmed Stormy’s account: “I’m not a big fan of sharks. I have people calling me up, ‘Sir, we have a fund to save the shark.’ I say ‘no thank you.’”
Trump told Nevadans that environmentalists are forcing manufacturers to build electric boats. Trump hates them, too. “What would happen if the boat sank from its weight?”, Trump worries. “You’re in the boat and you have this tremendously powerful battery and the battery is now underwater and there’s a shark that’s approximately 10 yards over there? What I’d do if there was a shark or you get electrocuted, I’ll take electrocution every single time. I’m not getting near the shark!”
Horror novelist Stephen King compared it to “listening to your senile uncle at the dinner table after he has that third drink.”
Trump was once Commander-in-Chief of our military, including the Navy. If Trump’s dinghy hadn’t slipped its mooring, he’d remember that every WWII submarine ran on batteries.
If Trump’s reactor hadn’t melted down, he’d remember that nuclear subs make vast amounts of electricity to power themselves in emergencies.
If Trump’s periscope went all the way to the surface, he’d remember that, while he was president, the Navy awarded its largest shipbuilding contract ever, $22.2-billion for nine attack submarines, to the Electric Boat Company.
No Commander-in-Chief could forget that. Unless, like Trump, you’ve lost the thread so badly you’ve finally jumped the shark.
Michael P. Rush
Leland